Ant Lion Trade
by Diluculo
Summary: [Oneshot, SPOILER FREE!] Ever wonder about the Ant Lion Men? Astor sensed no hostility from the peculiar creature, so he was more than happy to lend it some items. So it wasn't hostile, but...


"So what's for dinner, Noir?" Urushi lounged back in his padded chair, tapping his small cane on the arm of his partner's seat. "I feel like having some beef stew tonight."

"Whatever, Urushi," The woman glanced away from the short man beside her and continued to review the inventory of supplies that were needed for their next play.

"I'm quite partial to rappig meat, myself..." York hinted from the doorway, organizing boxes of wooden swords that were painted so as to look real.

"You're gonna make me do all the work, aren't cha?" Urushi slid from his chair, which was quite a distance, and waved his cane like an angry old man. "Fine. See if you get anything when I'm through!"

Noir paused long enough to exchange a curious look with York, who just shrugged after his other companion had left.

"I thought he liked to do that..." the circus performer clad as a pirate wondered out loud.

"He's so weird," Noir rolled her eyes. "But he's a man, so what can you expect?"

"...Hey!" York muttered after what seemed like a moment of hesitation long enough to be considered a delayed reaction time.

"Oh, you know I don't mean you, York," The woman rose from her desk and headed out the door. "You're too cute to be stupid."

"Oh, Noir..." the lanky man blushed and turned his back to his boss, burying himself in his chore as Noir made an easy escape. "You always know just what to say to a man..."

She hadn't heard his last comment as she traced her way back to her room. She stole a glance into the many booths that were arranged in a ring around her personal quarters, one of which happened to be the Ant Lion Man's stall. Poking her head into the closet that was connected to it, she noted one of the elaborate costumes was absent. Noir smiled to herself, glad that dinner would be taken care of, meaning she had to worry about one less thing now.

* * *

On that particular day in Chesedonia, Astor happened to be out for a walk, as he often felt the urge to explore his wonderful city all over again. Dismissing the last few guards, he wandered away from his vast mansion, deeply inhaling the fresh desert atmosphere. He saw much beauty in his domain; the sky was always clear, the gorgeous sea-blue color of Grand Chokmah's waterfalls. Maybe it was a bit warm, but if you wore light clothing, it was no problem, and he pitied the visitors coming from Keterburg that were still inclined to pack heavy coats, missing out on the nice weather. But such feelings were to be expected of the leader of the Merchant's Guild.

He took his usual route, mingling with the shopkeepers and buying a few rare imported goods made by Sheridan's finest craftsmen and doing his weekly grocery shopping at the same time. The people here saw him frequently, and offered hefty discounts; though Astor never needed them because of his large sum of personal income, he took them up on their offers. Obliging to all greetings with his trademark giggle that effectively caused a few newer tourists to keep their distance, he looped back to the Kimlascan side to catch up with the old jar-crazy armor seller near the inn.

They chatted about taxes and the most popular kind of leather, and then about economics and more on the skinning of monsters. When both were satisfied from their conversation, Astor was about to leave when he heard a strange shuffling from behind the inn. He thanked the seller for his time, and let the humble response be lost as he left to investigate the sound.

Turning the corner, Astor found himself face to face with a real live Ant Lion Man, like the kind that appeared in fairy tales written for children.

"Why, hello there, my good friend, do you come here often?" Astor stroked his greased mustache lightly.

"Me want 'rappig meat' and 'beef' and 'lottery gel'!" The wide-eyed creature's speech was choppy, as though it _had_ come straight from the children's books, ready to teach all who want to learn what a pronoun is.

"Heeheeheehee," Astor twirled his slick mustache around his finger. "Of course I'll always help a friend in need." The oblivious man pulled the requested items he'd just purchased from his traveling bag and handed them to the Ant Lion Man.

The creature gazed at the two slabs of meat plus a candy gel in his gloved palm. Turning to the sand pit he'd come from, he promptly tossed the treasures in without a second thought.

"Aw, you were just going to waste them?" Astor couldn't sound upset if he tried, but he skipped the chuckle this time. "What's wrong with them?"

The heavily clothed animal waved his arms in the air, shooing Astor back to the streets. He left rather confused, but he wasn't concerned about the loss of food; he still had plenty left. And just as quickly as that, the incident was forgotten behind Astor's new thoughts of his own dinner. He sauntered back to his mansion rubbing his hands together eagerly.

* * *

Noir was overseeing York move more packages from the garage to a room that was commonly used as a temporary storage room to hold props for upcoming shows.

"You idiot, you're doing it wrong," she was almost too fed up with the clumsy actor to sound any more excited. "I wanted the cardboard stuff over _there_. That's where all the painted backgrounds go!"

York mumbled a barely audible "Yes ma'am" as he lifted the box back to the proper place. He was almost knocked down as Urushi pushed the door open right in front of him. York regained his footing and managed to halt the box's descent awkwardly.

"Did you bring food?"

"Yeah. I was just comin' to tell youse guys, but it's not like you deserve it," Urushi disregarded the little act York had put on and turned to Noir. "You done wit this stuff yet?"

"Almost," Noir uttered impatiently. "We'll be ready when we're ready, so don't try to rush it, especially if it's your boss you're talking to!"

"Come off it, Noir," the orange-bearded man replied. "I brought home dinner, so why can't you just cut me a little slack, eh?"

"Fine," Noir tossed her clipboard to York, who had to swing the box he was holding so it would land on it rather than the clutter that may or may not have been concealing a floor. "Let's eat, then."

"I hope you remembered the rappig," York ventured.

"Yeah, and I also got you a little something else," he whispered as Noir strutted out the room.

"Oh! I love lottery gels! How much for it?"

"Hmmm..." Urushi brushed a bit of sand out of his beard, not at all above selling things to his friends. "Let's talk thousands..."


End file.
